lagpaw1229

I am such a sap, I always get teary eyed during the Olympic opening ceremonies. This time I think I was more choked up than usual because I am leaving for Portland in a few hours and stuff like that. . . I hope I can do well, I know that I can get somewhere at least . . . even if its kinda painful (pain is relative, but one could say that statement is easier said than lived)

Nothing is working in my favor in this lifetime . . . therefore.. I surrender to any illusion of success, for it is not in my favor to become successful in an obvious way, but to live gloriously and die . . .and I'm  ok with that. I will work as hard as I can and keep going unti the end. It doesn't  matter how it will happen. I die . . I will die. . . and there is noting that I feel sorry for or blame except for ... the suchness of existence which is illusory anyway. I don't know what I'm so unhappy about. I'm only getting whats coming to me. Perhaps, perhaps I will give my last bit of strenghth to share my story with people who care, but I d

this weekend I'm moving to portland oregon and I might not be posting on deviant art for a while, as I will be really busy with everything. Minna, please think of me and wish me well, since I am starting fresh in a new place. . .